Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Busy Week (part 4 of 4)

Before coming to work, just after I decided not to discuss about the vitamin c episode, I saw that my mother's cereal bread had a big green fluffy fungus. So, I told my father to tell my mother to check if it was only the crust or if the bread had gone bad. I'd have told him to throw it, but I knew what was coming.

He replied: "That's not fungus, the bread is just shabby." Actually, he used a slang that in Spanish means fungus, but he ignored they are the same xD...

Me: "Uhm... being shabby... having fungus... you still can't eat it."

Father: "But shabby is still edible, this fungus isn't bad for the health."

Me: (whatever...) "Ok, ok..."

When I was about to go, I told my mom to check the bread and throw it -.-

Busy Week (part 3 of 4)

Today I woke up and went to the bathroom (yes, it was mine >D), and my father called me. I knew it wasn't going to be something good. Starting the day talking to my father is never a good option.

I told him i needed to brush my teeth and then he came to meet me. He told me I had to drink a glass of orange juice first thing in the morning from now on so that I'm prepared for the winter, and that I could prepare it the night before O_o... Yes it was as random and out of nowhere as it is written here. I understand he was being caring and all but if I actually decided to tell him the truth:

- You have to drink orange (or any other fruit with vitamin C) juice while eating some fibers or proteins, so you won't lose the glucose in blood and cause an adverse effect. If drank alone, part of the glucose will become fat >.> and the other will circulate in the bloodstream, bad for people with glicemia.

- The orange juice has to be drank within 20 mins after squeezed. Else it loses all the vitamins and it's pointless. Squeezing it the night before? Forget it XD

After that, he told me how much it helped him with his breathing issues and that the orange juice cured what the doctors couldn't. What can I say? The mind’s power and placebo can cure it all o_o.

My father is so closed-minded that if he believes in something (whether true or not), that becomes a fact for him. In this case, he either made the orange thing become true for his body or his lung problems weren't as serious as he pictured them before :P

Busy Week (part 2 of 4)

It was Tuesday morning. I had the chance to go work a little bit later because I had to stay until 7pm to then attend a uni meeting :D. My father called me at 9 am, just as I requested (I don't hear the clock alarms 50% of the time). I was really tired after a hardcore dance class on Monday and I was sure no alarm would wake me up.

The thing is he was awake since 8am, but he waited to wake me up to get into our one and only bathroom. He could have used the service toilet... but NOOOO, he had to use the bathroom so I could not use the shower ¬_¬. Then I asked him if he was going to take too long and he replied "Wait, I just came in!!"

If he was planning on using the damn bathroom, why the fuck didn't he wait until he was done to wake me up. It's plain logic, when I wake up I'll need to use the bathroom O_o.

Another thing I really hate is when I wake up at my regular time and he tells me to "hurry up" because he wants to take a shower (yes, he can't do this to me, but it doesn't work the other way around >_>). He lives off an insurance because he's over 65 years old, doesn't have any work nor time tables to keep, he can take a shower anytime he wants because he's at home all day... and even when it takes me just 20 mins to get ready for work... I'M TOLD TO HURRY UP!

This is unfairness.

Busy Week (part 1 of 4)

Monday night we had a holy damn big storm. In 2 hours it rained 88mm O_o, some places are still with no electric power and others drowned. That day my dog was soaked and smelly, because he went to the yard to play >_>...

The thing is my dog is scared of thunder and he feels safe in my room/below my desk. But he was really smelly and I didn't want to let him in. Even then, my father opened the door to my room so the dog could come in. Not only did he smell like the dead, he also farted. EEEEEK! When I tried to take him out, shouting, he growled to me... showing he didn't wanna move.

I used the last resort. Showed him a new tennis ball (I use it as a shoulder massager against the wall :D). I never let him play with it and just use it as bait when I want him out my room. My father told me "Can't you see the dog is scared?!" and I replied "Can't you smell the dead body farting?!". And then the dog stayed in the living room with my father.

Friday, February 12, 2010

If you can't breathe... gin is the answer

It's not that I didn't have a story yesterday... you may forgive me for not posting it. It's just that it happened late at night, I was tired, my mouth in pain cause of braces adjustment and the hot weather wasn't helping either.

First of all, my father told me I could drink 7up if I wanted and commented on how much it costed, to see if I's tell him I'd cover half of it... that wouldn't happen. A few hours later, my mother told me he had won a small prize at the lottery and that's the reason why he was willing to share (not without trying to snudge some money from me).

Other than this, so you don't think my father is a beast (all the time), the day I got my braces adjusted he took pity on me and ordered some ice cream for me to eat. And he paid... incredible huh? I guess he still has some fatherly instinct.

Finally (and the funniest, IMO), he said he's "curing his breathing issues" (nothing serious) with 7up and Gin. And I saw him drinking a glass of that in the morning XD... judge for yourselves ladies and gentlemen! At least the 7up mystery is solved. He hadn't bought a soda drink out of the blue since 2008 xD, until the day before yesterday.

You see? A lot happened. Don't underestimate my father, heh.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Candies

There seems to be no way to let one day go without a story. I never thought, until I opened this blog, that so many crazy things were happening. Once the recording started, it's either that I became aware of the things that happen around me at home or I was ignoring/forgetting them after some minutes of ranting.

Yesterday, when I got home after work, I found the bank resume on my desk. Nothing abnormal. Later my father came in to my room and we had a heartwarming conversation:

Father: I saw it.

Me: Huh?

Father: The chocolates.

Me: Oh, yeah. That's the present my sister bought me from the beach.

Father: And you didn't share.

Me: Did I ask you to share the liquor that she bought for you? Also, I bought cookie sandwiches at the beach for the family, as well. And my sister said this was for me and she had got things for you and mom.

Father: That's something else. When I buy things, I always share. (which is a lie)

Me: But I didn't buy it. It's a present and you had yours, I'm not obligated to share.

Father: Okay, okay. You are right (irony). But you should have shared at least one with me and your mother.

Me: WHA-?! You both had your own presents, and I never asked you to share them! Also, if I didn't want you to see mine, I'd have hidden it.

[End of family drama.]

Later on, I went to visit a friend and when I came back home he had bought a bottle of 7up and explicitly told my mother it was for him alone, since he was told to drink it. So yeah, this is how he always shares what he buys.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

(Non) Sleeping habits

What would you do if you were trying to fall asleep and woke up to a lullaby of your father burping?

Well, this happened yesterday night. It wasn't the first time nor the last, for sure. He had insomnia and why not just wake up, go through my room (the rooms are connected) make noise and shuffle his feet, making sure if he can't sleep NOBODY CAN EITHER!

In the end, my sleepy brain was more powerful than the annoying creature whose burping technique is at the same level with Homer and The Critic in that legendary Simpsons episode.